Blogger's Block

The problem with having such a fantastic blog is the subsequent pressure the blogger feels to uphold his reputation. Every time I sit down to write, I feel the need to produce the witty and scintillating prose I am known for. That's tough to work through.

Putting pressure on myself is one of my fortes. I'm better at doing that than probably anything else. And as I've expressed now to many people, the pressure to quality-of-work relationship in my life can be viewed very clearly as a bell curve on a graph. Pressure motivates me to a certain point, but then it starts to stifle, strangle, and paralyze me.

I don't mean to be defeatist about it. I'm happy to have it as a motivating force, but sometimes the p-word gets to be too much. And since, when it comes right down to it, I'm really the main source of this pressure, it's maddening that it can get so intense.

As I continue to work on a paper that I have to rewrite, I find myself in a constant and bloody fistfight with my own Mr. P. He sits right on my left shoulder there, sneering, jeering, and generally distracting me in any way he can. "What the hell is that sentence?" he'll scoff. "Do you have any idea what you're talking about?" He goes right for the jugular most of the time, gesturing toward the computer screen and whispering snidely, "Maybe you should just reconsider your entire graduate school career. This stuff is crap!"

So I'll be damned if I let him sneak into my blogging space and start taunting me here. I need to post more often, whenever I feel like it, because this writing should be fun and easy. And I know you'll still love me even if I throw up a bad post. Even if Mr. P here says otherwise.

P.S. Need confirmation of my genius? Here it is. I've inspired an old friend to start a blog of her own: me: re my life