Four Eyes

For most people, it'’s tax day. For me, it’'s glasses day.

Well, technically, glasses day will be Monday, when I pick them up, but today is the day I have been inducted into the glasses-wearing population. The doctor said it wasn’t bad yet but it would probably get a little worse over the next few years. “"Graduate school will do that to you,”" he said. So for now, I’'ll just wear them when I drive and when I want to be able to see the chalkboard.

I was expecting to have to shell out fistfuls of money for the privilege of being able to see, but I managed to come in at under $200 for the whole shebang. I did, however, ignore my mother'’s advice.

She told me to avoid cheap frames. “"How will I know they'’re cheap?”" I asked. “"Pink plastic,"” she said. I didn'’t exactly go pink plastic. Purple is more like it. But they'’re fun... and they were inexpensive, which made them pretty damn attractive.

Now I can fully incarnate the stereotype. In my turtleneck sweater, hair pulled back, glasses pushed up on the bridge of my nose, I am the girl gone mild par excellence. But that'’s all right. For those who really care, it should be a welcome change. After all, guys don’t make passes at girls who wear glasses.